Christian dating and patience

I remember praying fervently that God would let me marry a certain girl I was dating years ago, but he didn’t. You’re not “hunting.” If you do with the idea that might meet some nice people, even though you might not meet “the one,” you should be okay. I had been doing the online thing for several years; and she was doing it for the first time.I was disappointed at the time but, in hindsight, I realize she was not the right person for me at the time, and I understand now why He didn’t answer my prayer affirmatively. I was attending a church of about 200 with no singles group (and very few singles); she was attending a church of several thousand with huge singles group.To help find the right questions, we called on three not-yet-married friends who gave some time to thinking about the challenges faced by singles: Lore Ferguson, Paul Maxwell, and the recently engaged Marshall Segal.We ended up with these questions: The Bible commands Christians to marry “in the Lord,” that is, to marry other Christians (1 Corinthians ; 2 Corinthians ).I wanted to be married from my early 20’s, but God had other plans.

Now practically speaking, this means singles are seeking out people to speak into their lives.

Nothing in my life and faith has been more confusing and spiritually hazardous than my pursuit of marriage. Maybe you’ve wanted the relationship or liked the guy or girl, and you’ve never had the chance.

From far too young, I longed for the affection, safety, and intimacy I anticipated with a wife. I experimented too much with our hearts and allowed things to go too far. And now my singleness is a regular reminder that I messed up, missed opportunities, or did it wrong. Maybe all the suggestions and advice you’ve collected has become a confusing mess of good-intentioned contradictions and ambiguity.

I pray to God and ask Him to help me be more patient. So, online dating worked for us, because it provided a way to meet available single Christians in our area. We need to pray and ask God for our desires, and then ask Him what our part should be.

Sometimes, it might be to simply wait on the Lord and do nothing else.

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First of all, I didn’t get saved until I was 32, so my relationships up to that point were not at all Christ-centered.

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